CUT TO:
FADE IN:
1 EXT. OFF COAST OF ANTIGUA, 1775 (BLACK & WHITE) - DAY 1
SUPER: "ANTIGUA, 1775"
A dinghy filled with five grizzled pirates rowing through
rough waters. Two passengers, cleaner than the rest, sit in
the middle looking around quite nervously.
PASSENGER#1
Ah... maybe this wasn't a good idea.
I think that I...
PIRATE#1
Ah, ne'r ye mind. Capn's always
lookin' fer fresh meat. Er, new
blood.
One of the other pirates grabs his shoulder, making him jump.
PIRATE#2
Yeah... 'sides, who wouldn't wanna'
be parta' the fiercest crew afloat?
Hmm?
Laughs. The small rowboat pulls up next to a large, fully
armored and decorated pirate ship. The INFERNO. It is
anchored closely to a strange, circular reef. A rope ladder
is thrown over the port side for them to board ship. Lots
of activity. Two or three men are standing down on the reef.
A pirate slaps one of the passengers' butts as he climbs up.
The other is poked with a sword to hurry him up the ladder.
PIRATE#1
Don' fall... wouldn't want ye ta
feed the sharks a'for meetin the
cap'n.
PASSENGER#2
Sh-sharks?
The men climb aboard and join the group on deck near the
mainmast. Various remarks and catcalls mock the passengers
until everyone suddenly quiets down and looks toward the
captain's galley door. It creaks open. Out of the shadows,
a burly figure steps forth. We only see him from the right
side. There is a slight limp to his walk as he makes his
way to the center of the group. He stops almost face to
face with the passengers.
WILLY
Welcome aboard the Inferno.
2.
In an instant, we see his left side... and the decorated
patch covering his left eye. ONE-EYED WILLY. He is in his
mid-30's and doesn't look like your typical idea of a pirate
except for the eye patch. He is clean-shaven and speaks
very well.
WILLY (CONT'D)
I hear that you wish to become
pirates.
(He cracks a smile)
That true?
PASSENGER#1
Yes... We do, sir.
WILLY
Fine. Then pirates you are. Just
not aboard this ship until you
accomplish one thing.
PASSENGER#1
J-just one thing? What "thing"?
WILLY
The Gauntlet.
The crew gives a deep moan, almost in unison. Some laugh.
PASSENGER#2
What is the "gauntlet"?
WILLY
Oh... nothing really. Just a test.
Two huge Samoan-looking pirates grab the passengers roughly
from behind. Others begin tying ropes around their wrists.
WILLY (CONT'D)
A simple test to see if you have
what it takes to become a member of
my elite crew of "ruthless
barbarians". All you have to do is
retrieve a sword for me. That's it.
The pirates drag the frightened passengers towards the bow
of the ship, tying them to the wooden point in front. They
toss them over the front so they are hanging upside-down by
their ankles -- just above and to each side of the carved
wooden lady that adorns the bow of the ship.
WILLY (CONT'D)
Unfortunately for you two, the weapons
are located BENEATH the Inferno.
Attached to the centermost point of
her lovely hull are your keys back
onto the ship. One for each of you.
Bring them to me, and you shall reap
the benefits of all that I have to
offer.
Two pirates carry over a large barrel and dump it overboard
beneath the passengers. It is filled with bloody remains,
and quickly turns the water red.
WILLY (CONT'D)
Oh. There is a rope ladder at the
stern of the ship. If you still
have an arm left by then, please
feel free to use it.
A shark fin pops out of the water below the men. The water
starts to churn rapidly as several sharks vie for the chum.
It appears that they have been here for a while. The pirates
aboard ship begin to howl and place bets. Willy grins. The
two passengers begin to scream as their ropes are cut from
the ship. Passenger#1 is cut free first and lands roughly
on top of one of the sharks. His hands are still tied
loosely. He is desperately trying to free himself as
Passenger#2 splashes down beside him. Sharks are everywhere.
Another barrel of chum is dumped on top of them. Passenger#2,
covered in blood, reddish water, and meat chunks... gives a
brief terrified look at Passenger#1, but doesn't help him.
He takes a deep breath, then dives amid the sharks and starts
under the ship. Passenger#1 frees himself, then breathes
deeply and dives under.
UNDERWATER
The water is very clear, and it is easy to see that the water
is alive with sharks. Passenger#2 leads by about two body
lengths. As passenger#1 starts off, a shark attacks him,
slicing into his leg. Passenger#1 twists around to see the
beast gripping his leg and kicks roughly at the shark with
everything he has. Another sharks brushes by his side. His
heel connects with the eye of the shark, and he is released.
He spastically swims away with a trail of blood flowing from
the severe wound. Passenger#2 has reached the center of the
ship where two swords are mounted in a small receded area
about four feet from each other on either side of the keel.
He reaches up and grabs the handle of the closest one. As
quickly as he grabs it, two panels spring into place on each
side of his wrist... locking his arm inside. He begins
panicking, wildly trying to get his wrist free. Passenger#1
swims up seeing the other sword, then the trapped passenger.
He swims over to Passenger#2 and tries to help him. Nothing.
He twists around and sees a very large shark heading toward
them. He quickly pushes away and goes to the other sword.
Instead of grabbing it, he kicks at it. The sword falls out
as the panels slide quickly into place, trapping nothing
besides water this time. He almost misses catching the sword
before it plunges into the depths. He turns back to
Passenger#2. Only an arm hangs from the trapped panel now.
A small trail of blood leads away from the limb. He lets
out what remaining air that he has and swims up to the port
side of the ship.
Bursting through the surface of the water, he gasps loudly
for air. He is only a few feet from the reef. The pirates
scream in support. He swims rapidly to the reef, trying to
climb up. A shark swims by. The four pirates on the reef
quickly push him back into the water!
PIRATE#3
Uh-uh! Ye ain't finished yet... ye
gotta' get ta' the ship!
With his leg trailing a lot of blood, he swims rapidly towards
the stern of the ship. A shark bumps him as he rounds the
aft of the Inferno. A rope ladder is mounted to the stern.
The pirates are staring down at him, screaming in support.
Exhausted, he fumbles for the rungs.
PIRATE#1
Ye better jump, flea!
The pirate points behind Passenger#1. A shark fin is speeding
towards him. He quickly tries to climb the ladder, but he
is tired, has a sword in one hand, and his wounded leg isn't
working very well. Just as the shark is about to bear down
on him, he is pulled up with the ladder by the group of
pirates. They cheer loudly as they grasp his wet clothes
and pull him aboard. He collapses onto the deck, bleeding
and breathing heavily. Willy steps up to him.
WILLY
Well, men... it appears that we have
a new shipmate!
Cheers. Passenger#1 weakly raises his sword into the air.
Willy reaches down, pulling him to his feet. He stumbles.
WILLY (CONT'D)
Someone attend to his leg! We don't
need another damn peg leg aboard!
A pirate with a bone peg leg hurries forward with bandages
and starts to work on Passenger#1's wound.
PASSENGER#1
(weakly)
How many have...
5.
WILLY
Huh? Speak up, mate!
PASSENGER#1
How... How many have made it though
that alive?
WILLY
None! You are the first, Matey.
Not too easy, was it?
A lot of shouting and pointing. A small dinghy has made its
way to the ship. A man hurriedly climbs aboard and heads
directly toward Willy. He is out of breath and sighs deeply
before speaking.
MESSENGER
They 're almost upon us. A ship
just pulled into port and said they
passed 'em on the way in. A DAY'S
travel! THEY ARE ALMOST HERE!
PIRATE#1
Ye said we had weeks, Cap'n!
There is much excitement on board. Everyone has turned to
face Willy as if expecting answers that he doesn't have.
PIRATE#2
Yeah! Wha' happened? We...
WILLY
ENOUGH! The English have gained on
us sooner than I had planned, but
all is not yet lost.
(He motions toward
the side of the ship
where the reef is)
Close it up... NOW! We are leaving!
PIRATE#1
But Cap'n... there are MEN down there!
WILLY
I don't care! Let God worry about
them -- Not me.
Willy smiles at the new passenger, then turns and heads back
to his quarters.
WILLY (CONT'D)
And get that man a change of clothes.
He's a welcome addition to the crew!
He slams the door shut behind him.
2 EXT. - INFERNO - NIGHT 2
The ship crashes through the waves. Windswept pirates cover
the deck, rushing to and fro. Standing on the poop deck,
Willy stares into the night behind them through a spy glass.
A single light can barely be seen on the horizon.
PIRATE#2
Cap'n? Anything?
WILLY
Yes.
Time passes. Various images of a very long and rough trip.
The English ship is much faster and is gaining. There is a
firefight. The Inferno is outgunned. Damaged, they try to
flee. The English ship follows.
3 EXT. INFERNO - DAY 3
Willy is staring back at the very close ship. He looks down
at a crude map. A pirate comes running up to him, breathless.
PIRATE#1
Cap'n! They says there's a cave
aroun' the bend a bit! Can barely
be seen from the nest...
He motions up to crow's nest perched on the masthead.
WILLY
And?
PIRATE#1
We was thinkin' that we could pull
the Inferno inside. You know, so...
WILLY
Big enough for her, eh? Hmmm. If
they pass by, we can swing around
behind her...
(pauses)
Aye. DO IT! NOW!
An Instant flurry of action begins aboard the Inferno.
WILLY (CONT'D)
Cut her as close to the shore as ye
can! We need to make it in before
they can see around the bend! MOVE,
fer God's sake, MOVE! Man the hand
lead and lines!
7.
4 INT. CAVE ABOARD THE INFERNO - DARKNESS 4
Pirates crouch in the shadows peering out between the gunwale.
The Inferno is tucked silently within the darkened walls of
a VERY large cave. The men watch silently as the trailing
ship rounds the bend outside the cave about 1000 yards out
at sea. It continues without slowing. The men aboard the
Inferno begin to smile.
Suddenly, the smiling stops. The ship starts to turn towards
them. It is obvious that they have been seen. The crew
starts scurrying to their posts. They are trapped. The
ship outside moves into place and starts firing towards the
cave. Gradually, the cannons begin to find targets. The
cave starts to collapse around the Inferno. Willy stands at
the stern of his ship... shadows of the collapsing cave dance
across his hardened face until all that is left is darkness.
CUT TO:
5 INT. - ONE-EYED WILLY'S HOUSE O' ANTIQUES - DAY 5
BEGIN CREDITS.
During the credits, we are privy to the many objects of
curiosity lining the walls of the shop. There is a framed
yellowed newspaper article about the discovery of an
empty pirate ship off the coast of Hawaii, and another
on the arrest of the Fratelli family thanks to a group
of kids from the Goon docks. Somewhere among the articles
we even catch a glimpse of the map & doubloon that led
to the original adventure. At the end of the credits
there is a framed photo of the original group of Goonies
huddled together: MIKEY, BRAND, CHUNK, DATA, MOUTH, ANDY,
& STEF.
END CREDITS.
A hand reaches down and grasps an inhaler next to the
cash register. MIKEY inhales deeply, then begins to
breathe normally. He is now in his mid 20's, but will
never appear to be his true age. The front door of the
shop creaks open, accompanied by the sound of the
connected chimes. Mikey looks up from the dusty book
that he is reading to see an elderly man, CHESTER
COPPERPOT III, enter the store. He is in his fifties,
and is obviously well-to-do. The door slowly closes
behind him as he steps toward the front counter, staring
off distantly. Mikey straightens himself up a bit.
MIKEY
Good afternoon, Sir.
The man seems to ignore him. He turns, appearing to be
looking for something.
He walks briskly toward the display case containing the
MEDALLION & SKELETON KEY from the first film. He brushes
his fingers gently across the top... almost caressing
the glass. Mikey comes out from behind the counter as
the man attempts to open the case.
MIKEY (CONT'D)
Uh, Sir that is not for sale. It's
only a display...
CHESTER
Twenty-Five thousand.
Mikey stumbles a bit.
MIKEY
Excuse me?
CHESTER
Twenty-Five thousand. Cash.
MIKEY
F-For those...?
CHESTER
(Slowly. Pronounced.)
Each.
The man has not yet looked at Mikey. Suddenly, the door
swings open behind them. TAMI enters the store. She is
about the same age as Mikey, and obviously knows him
quite well.
TAMI
Hi, Babe...
(spotting the
customer)
Oh, sorry.
She quietly goes behind the counter. Mikey slowly turns
back to Chester nervously.
MIKEY
I, uh, can't. Did you say...
"Each"?
CHESTER
(Finally looks up
at Mikey)
I will pay you fifty thousand
dollars cash for these two pieces.
Tami's attention is instantly hooked by his words.
9.
MIKEY
No. No, I can't. They're special --
we went though a lot together.
Tami moves in from around the counter.
TAMI
Mike...
CHESTER
Mr. Walsh, EVERYTHING has a price.
What do you need from me to make
us BOTH happy? Just say a number.
TAMI
Mikey...
MIKEY
No. I'm sorry, they are not for
sale.
Mikey turns from him, and heads back to the counter.
Chester stands there for a moment before heading for the
door. He is obviously annoyed. Tami trails after him.
TAMI
Uh, Mr... let me talk to him.
He's just...
They both exit to the street. Through the window we can
see them talking. He hands her something, then goes to
his car. She returns inside.
TAMI (CONT'D)
Mikey, do you realize what we
could do with that money? We...
MIKEY
Yes, Tam. I know.
(takes a deep breath
from the inhaler.)
Those aren't really mine to sell.
They were a gift from a VERY old
friend.
Tami stares, her face very slowly changing from confusion
to love. She moves forward, gently touching his face.
TAMI
You know that they have treatments
for obsessive-compulsive disorder,
right?
(pauses with a smile)
Ok, Mr. You win.
You get to keep your trinkets.
We can squalor in poverty for
now.
They embrace. Behind him, she tosses the BUSINESS CARD
that Chester handed her onto the counter. It lands face
down.
6 T. INT. - OREGON STATE PRISON -- EVENING 6
An INMATE lazily rolls a cart covered in books, magazines,
and newspapers down the row of prison cells. He hands a
few books through the bars of a couple cells. At one,
we see a HAND poke out with two packs of cigarettes. He
takes them, giving a sly glance around -- then reaches
under the stack of magazines and gives the hand a copy
of PLAYBOY. He wheels up to the next cell and stops.
JAKE FRATELLI is laying on his cot. He looks up at the
INMATE and gives a crooked smile.
JAKE
Whatcha' got, Buzz? Any hacksaws
today?
INMATE
Yeah, but I just gave the last
one away to someone who knows how
to use it.
JAKE
Oh, that hurt. Just gimme' my
paper.
The INMATE takes the top newspaper, and begins to pass
it through the bars. GUARD1 steps up and swipes it from
his hand before JAKE takes it. The INMATE looks at the
guard, then pushes his cart forward to the next cell.
GUARD1
What the hell's this shit?
(reading the paper)
The "Astoria Times Delta"? How
cute... Why do YOU care what goes
on in Astoria -- ain't like you're
ever gonna' go back, Jake.
JAKE stands up, pressing his face against the bars.
JAKE
I like to read the obituaries...
hoping I might find someone I know.
GUARD1
Oh, yeah... ain't that the section
where I found your mother's picture?
Geez, you'd think she could at least
crack a smile.
Jake's eyes widen, furious. He swings his arms out between
the bars, trying to grab the guard.
JAKE
You son-of-a-bitch! I'll get YOUR
damn picture in the paper... she
died in PRISON. I didn't even get a
chance to see her!
The guard backs away quickly, laughing as he smacks at Jake's
hand with the rolled up newspaper. He tosses the paper to
the floor near the cell.
GUARD1
Kill a federal agent, and you deserve
to die in the CHAIR. Not a prison
cell. She got lucky. Tell your
brother I send my regards. I heard
he's been raked over so many times
now that he's gotta' wear Diapers.
The guard heads off with a smirk. Slowly, Jake reaches down
and picks up the paper without lifting his eyes off the guard.
He mumbles to himself as he lies down on his bunk to read
the paper.
CUT TO:
7 EXT. DATA'S HOUSE - DAY 7
A MAILMAN opens the mailbox located outside DATA'S house,
and inserts a few pieces of mail. Along the side of the
mailbox are the words, "RICK WANG". As soon as the door is
closed, a light activates on the front of the box. The
mailman shakes his head and walks off. The mailbox starts
to tilt at an odd upward angle until all of the mail slides
back into the clear chute that serves as the post the box
sits on. It disappears underground.
8 INT. DATA'S HOUSE - DAY 8
Inside, the mail shoots out of a tube onto a strange sorting
machine. It takes each piece of mail individually, opening
the side with a sharp letter opener. A tweezer-like arm
separates the sides of the envelope and removes the letters
from inside. One particular letter looks as if it is written
on old parchment paper. The armature moves this letter over
to the adjoining computer and slides it into a flatbed
scanner.
The monitor next to it begins displaying the full screen
image as it is scanned into the system:
"Ye are invited to the wedding of Michael "Mikey" Walsh and
Tami Lynn Springmeyer"
It is a fancy wedding invitation made up to look like a
treasure map. There is a big red "X" over Astoria, Oregon.
The modem starts dialing out.
9 INT. KATTEL TOYS, DATA'S OFFICE - DAY 9
DATA, now in his late 20's, is seated at his computer. He
is the lead toy designer for Kattel Toys. Various posters
and items he's created decorate his wild office. A poster
for "Slick Shoes" hangs behind him. A VOICE comes across
his computer speakers.
VOICE
You've got mail.
Data leans forward and clicks on an icon. The Wedding
invitation appears on his screen -- instantly scanned and
mailed from home. As he reads, a smile forms.
DATA
All Right! He's gettin' married!
10 INT. DEVEREAUX HOME - DAY 10
STEF sits at her sculpting wheel, hands covered in wet clay.
In one hand, she has the wedding invitation. Her eyes are
wide with excitement as she hurriedly pushes the buttons on
the phone to dial out. It rings. MOUTH answers on the other
end.
MOUTH (O.S.)
Clarke Devereaux here.
STEF
Mikey's getting married! In Astoria!
MOUTH (O.S.)
Whoa, whoa... Mikey WALSH? Shit,
you sure, Babe?
STEF
Of course I'm sure, Dork. Why would
I say that if I wasn't sure? I have
the invitation right here!
11 INTERCUT - FRONT OF CITY HALL, BEAVERTON, OR - DAY 11
MOUTH
I love when you call me names, Stef.
13.
He is on his Cellular phone, and surrounded by election signs
covered with his name and picture. He is running for public
office. A lady walks up and shakes his hand while he is on
the phone.
MOUTH (CONT'D)
When's the wedding?
STEF (O.S.)
You have to wait until you get HOME
to find out. Soon I hope?
MOUTH
You wanna' get all "Demi Moore" with
the clay again?
(chuckles)
I should be home in a bit, Stef
(pause)
Yeah, I love you too.
He hangs up the phone and smiles at a few of the people
passing by. He hands out a few election buttons.
MOUTH (CONT'D)
Wow... Mikey. Married.
12 INT. CHUNK'S UC BERKELEY DORM - DAY 12
A student wearing a Berkeley T-shirt walks down the dorm
hallway waving a letter above his head. He yells down the
hallway.
STUDENT
Lawrence! You got a letter here...
looks kind of strange. LAWRENCE!
CHUNK pokes his head out of his room. He is no longer
overweight, and actually looks quite serious now.
CHUNK
Yeah? What is it?
STUDENT
Weird, man. Looks like an invitation
or something.
He tosses the old-parchment envelope at Chunk.
STUDENT (CONT'D)
What the hell does "Chunk" mean?
Chunk stares down at the envelope. "Lawrence 'Chunk' Cohen"
is written in decorative calligraphy on the front. Dazed,
he backs quickly into his dorm room and shuts the door. He
rips open the envelope and pulls out the invitation.
As he reads it, his face lights up. He starts to scream in
excitement. The student in the hallway hears this, then
walks away shaking his head.
STUDENT (CONT'D)
(to himself)
What a freak.
13 INT. LUMBER MILL, ASTORIA, OREGON, DAY 13
Extremely dirty from work, BRAND is standing reading though
the invitation. People are working all around him. Saws,
forklifts, etc. By the look on his face, this is his first
time reading the letter. He looks ecstatic.
BRAND
Hey, everyone! My brothers getting
married!
Through all the noise, a few guys look over confused. Not
sure what he said.
WORKER#1
"You lover's getting carried?" What
the hell does THAT mean, Brand?
BRAND
No... My...
He waves for a few of the machines to stop.
BRAND (CONT'D)
My BROTHER'S getting MARRIED!
There is an awkward pause.
WORKER#2
And you're happy?
WORKER#1
Poor bastard.
The machines start back up, and everyone goes back to work.
One worker walks past brand and pats his back.
WORKER#3
Sorry, Bud. Better him than you.
Brand is oblivious to them, and walks off smiling.
14 INT. PRESCHOOL CLASSROOM - DAY 14
ANDY is on the phone at the back of the classroom. Children
are playing loudly throughout the room. A few are finger
painting near the front.
ANDY
Are you sure?
STEF (O.S.)
What is it with you people? Chunk
was the one who made up stories...
not me. Of course I am sure. I
have the invitation right here.
ANDY
Wow. It almost feels surreal. What's
her name?
STEF (O.S.)
Tami. Cute. I didn't even know he
was dating anyone.
ANDY
Do you... do you think Brand will be
there?
STEF (O.S.)
Duh. It's his brother. Of course
he will be there. Why? Uh-Oh... A
coal still burning in the fire? I
thought you were living with that
prissy model guy, Jason.
ANDY
Well... It's a long story. He was
just the short version of it.
Everyone seems so... Boring.
One of the kids purposely steps on a plastic squirt bottle
of blue paint. It sprays all over one of the other kids,
and the chalkboard behind. Screaming.
ANDY (CONT'D)
Oh, crap. Gotta' go, Stef.
STEF (O.S.)
Call me...
ANDY
I will!
She hangs up, and heads over to the newly created mess.
CUT TO:
15 INT. OREGON STATE PRISON -- NIGHT 15
Feet clicking down the darkened hallway. Two prison guards
stop in front of JAKE'S cell. The door slides open. Jake
is asleep in his rack. Guard1 steps inside, quietly.
The other one stands outside of the cell.
GUARD1
Pssst. Hey, Dirtbag.
Jake quickly wakes up, scared.
JAKE
Yeah, yeah? Who... the hell?
(realizing who it is)
I didn't do nothin'! I --
GUARD1
Get up, you're coming with us. Now.
Jakes looks around quickly. Something isn't right. He looks
worried.
JAKE
Look, Man. I'm OK with you sayin'
crap about my Mom. Say whatever you
want --
GUARD1
Shut the Hell up, Jake. You have 30
seconds, or I am going to walk out
of here without you.
Jake looks up confused.
JAKE
So... all I have to do is lay here
and you'll leave?
GUARD1
You don't WANT me to leave without
you. Trust me.
Jake slowly starts to get out of bed. He reaches over for
his pants and starts to put them on while still eyeing the
guards suspiciously. The three of them start to head back
down the corridor of cells.
JAKE
What's this about?
GUARD1
The warden wants to see you.
JAKE
In the middle of the night? Gimme'
a break. You guys planing on shooting
me? Saying that I was trying to
escape --
GUARD2
Jeezus. Are you for real?
JAKE
I've seen the movies. You guys always
pull that kind of shit.
GUARD1
Oh, and by that theory... all
prisoners are actually innocent,
right?
Both guards give a slight chuckle. Jake looks around
nervously as they pass through a few open doors. They enter
a large darkened room. Someone is seated at the desk hidden
by shadows.
GUARD1 (CONT'D)
Need one of us to stay with you?
From the shadows.
WARDEN
That will not be needed. Go about
your business and have a good night.
GUARD1
You need us to check back in? To
take this scumbag back to his...
WARDEN
No.
The guard looks confused. He shrugs his shoulders, then the
two guards exit the room. The door closes behind them.
There is an awkward silence.
JAKE
Uh, Warden. I ain't been causin' no
problems, Sir.
WARDEN
Mr. Fratelli.
JAKE
...and I'm actually kinda tired too.
(fakes a yawn)
Gotta' get ready for my parole board
hearing next Thursday.
WARDEN
Jake. There isn't going to BE a
parole hearing.
Jake looks stunned. The door suddenly swings open behind
him, making him jump. There is a ruckus as three men enter.
FRANCIS
I...I didn't do anything! Come on,
guys. Jus' let me go back to my
cell. Please? PLEASE?
Two officers roughly shove FRANCIS into the room. He falls
to his knees. The Warden quickly stands.
WARDEN
Enough!
The two guards back out of the room.
FRANCIS
Warden... I...
JAKE
Francis? Francis!
FRANCIS
Wha? Jake? That you?
He quickly stands up. They momentarily stare at each other
before hugging.
JAKE
It's good to see you, Bud.
All of the sudden, Jake shoves him away a bit.
JAKE (CONT'D)
Why the hell are you lettin' them
push you around, Francis? Huh?
What would Ma think?
The Warden clears his voice, and they both slowly turn to
him.
WARDEN
Save the reunion festivities for
later, won't you? We are here to
work out some details.
FRANCIS
Huh? For what? What is this, Jake?
JAKE
I dunno. Warden... what did you
mean? I'm not havin' a hearing?
WARDEN
Do you really think they are ever
going to let you out, Jake?
Seriously?
JAKE
Sure. I have...
WARDEN
No. They won't. Roaches like
yourselves are destined to scurry in
the halls of prison your entire lives.
Sure. You may see the light of day,
but you always come home to nest.
JAKE
Oh.
WARDEN
However, there are other ways out of
this uh, "Roach Motel". Can I
interest you in an open door?
FRANCIS
Wait. We been here for over fifteen
years without ever talkin' with you...
sides' our introduction the first
day. Now...
JAKE
...You're our best friend? Like I
asked before, you guys setting us
up?
The Warden smirks a bit, then stands up. He casually walks
over to Jake and Francis.
FRANCIS
Oh, I'm not your friend. Never
confuse that with what we are talking
about here. I would just as soon
shoot you as feed you. You two are
nothing besides green to line my
pockets with. If it weren't for
money, we wouldn't be here talking.
JAKE
We don't have any money, Warden.
Suddenly a voice comes from a darkened corner of the room.
Chester Copperpot III.
CHESTER
Yes, but gentlemen... I do.
They both spin to look at a face they can't see. Chester
makes no move to help them see.
FRANCIS
Who the Hell?
WARDEN
You two have only one chance.
He picks up two very thick folders from his desk.
WARDEN (CONT'D)
Knowing how stupid you two are, I
know one isn't enough. But one it
is. Your friend here -- Um, OUR
friend here -- has made me happy.
Happy enough to chance several things
on you. You blow this, and I report
you as escaped. I guarantee that I
can put together a manhunt big enough
to scrape you from whatever shoe you
try to hide under. You do what he
asks -- and then quietly disappear
when you are done... and these files
are filed away permanently. With my
signature. Nobody will ask questions
that I can't answer.
The Fratelli's look stunned.
JAKE
This ain't no trick?
CHESTER
No. Do exactly as I ask, and you
two will be free men within a week.
WARDEN
That is a scary thought.
JAKE
What's the catch?
CHESTER
No catch really. You just have to
promise me that I will have your
undivided attention and commitment
for the next week. No questions
asked.
FRANCIS
No problem! You got it... What are
we doing? Housework? Cleaning your
car? Driving you around...
CHESTER
You may actually enjoy this. One
last job... finishing up something
that you had already started.
JAKE
All it's gonna' to cost us is one
week?
CHESTER
Gentlemen, it may end up costing you
your lives.
WARDEN
We can only hope!
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